RELATIONSHIPS – EGO
QUESTION : Is it true that Ego can bring down a person?
ANSWER : Yes Absolutely, whether ego brings down a person or not, it certainly brings down the peace of a person Everyone goes through this phase in life where the ego drives one to do anything and everything only to get noticed and recognized. Ego survives on gaining attention But then one must outgrow that phase of life. Understand in ego every moment is heavy, every situation is nerve – racking, every interaction is tense… an ego – filled heart is always walking on fire. With ego you are always struggling all the time to win over situations. Understand having ego in relationships is never worth the losses. How many precious relationships have been lost in order to satisfy the ego? While you should have dropped the ego and saved the relationship, you ended up dropping the relationship and saving the ego
A crow carrying a piece of meat in its beak found itself being chased by all the other birds. It dropped the piece of meat, and all the birds went after the meat. Now, alone in the sky the crow remarked ” In losing the piece of meat, I gained the freedom of the skies”. The piece of meat is ego. And, the freedom is your peace of mind
Please understand Ego is never worth the losses.
When ego comes, everything else goes. When ego goes, everything else comes. Remember your peace of mind should always be your highest priority in life. Never trade it for anything in life, it’s just not worth it.
SPIRITUALITY – LET’S REFLECT
QUESTION : I pray to my Lord every morning. That is Prayer in life I hear you say Life is Prayer. How do I grow from Prayer in life to Life is a Prayer?
ANSWER : Today is His gift unto you. Recognize the heart of the divine behind this 24 – hour material. Realize abusing the gift of Today is abusing the giver Value your Today
RELATIONSHIPS – IS ALL ABOUT LOVE
A father brings up his only son, by giving him the very best of education to becoming a most successful businessman of the country. The father being a single parent as he had lost his wife within a few years of marriage, was indeed very proud of his son. The son gets married to an equally educated girl and life goes on smoothly for all the three of them. As time goes by slowly but surely a rift keeps developing between the father and daughter – in – law. The father being a very humble and spiritually inclined person by nature was the one who always gave in to every situation to maintain peace in the house. However the daughter – in – law was very clever in brainwashing her husband to kindly enrol the father into an old aged home. The father readily agreed to this condition also. The son though reluctant about the whole issue gets his father admitted to one of the finest old age homes. Next to the old age home was a church and the priest of the church happened to be a very good friend of the father. The son leaves promising to visit his father every Sunday without fail. The priest on knowing the father really well pays a visit to him at the old age home the following Sunday. The son also lands up to meet up with his father. As destiny would have it, the preist leaves both the son and father to meet up and asks the son to meet him in the church before leaving for home. The son readily agrees and after spending quality time with his father goes on to meet the priest. The priest reminds the son of how the father and the priest were very good friends since childhood and as the conversation moves on the priest reveal a startling truth to the son of which the son was never aware of. The priest reveals,
My dear son, once upon a time this very old age home was a home for abandoned children and you were one of the child abandoned by your parents right after your birth. This gentleman who you regard as your father is not your original dad, you were adopted by him as soon as you were abandoned by your original parents. He has always been a very noble soul and has hidden this truth from you all his life My dear son your father definitely doesn’t deserve a life like this. The son on hearing the truth about his father breaks down and realizes his mistake. He immediately goes to meet his father and asks for forgiveness. The father readily forgives the son. The son immediately makes arrangements to take back his father into the family and gives him the the very best of everything in life. Truly touching to understand what are relationships all about Love being the need of the hour, we all need to understand never to treat anyone in life in such a manner. Knowingly or unknowingly all we humans need is a lot of love and a little understanding to set things right in life.
Relationships is all about loving each other unconditionally
I AM A PEACEFUL BEING
QUESTION : How do I realize or understand that I am a peaceful being? How to prove it?
ANSWER : By experimenting Understand everything is a belief, we experiment with it and if we get the results, we take it as the truth. We hear “Keep searching for peace as that’s the purpose of life”
If the purpose of life is to keep searching for peace then when will we get it.
But now we understand
Peace is our nature Let me experiment — I am a peaceful being. Now I will use this awareness in every act,, with every person I come across in my life. In every interaction today I will only remember that I am a peaceful being. Think of a doctor, he knows that he is a doctor, so if someone meets with an accident while he is around, he will immediately get into the healing job But if the doctor forgets that he is a doctor, even if people are bleeding, he won’t do anything, because he has forgotten that he is a doctor So healing will not come into action. But the minute he remembers, who he is, he will start healing.
So it’s all about awareness that I am a peaceful being, and because it was forgotten I am looking for peace outside, but the truth is that through meditation I can experience this truth from within. Try it, just experiment with it and realize this truth yourself.
Every act we do let us do it with awareness that we are peaceful beings. Understand that your happiness is not dependent on people, objects or situations. No one can make us happy and we can’t make others happy, till they themselves want it.
No one is responsible for our hurt, pain, fear or anger. It is our own creation in response to their behavior and we have a choice
The choice to be happy and peaceful with ourselves
RELATIONSHIPS – HANDLING ANGER IN THE RIGHT WAY
QUESTION : Wouldn’t people consider us weak if we quietly listen to unpleasant things without reacting?
ANSWER : What is more important : how I feel or what people say
We need to check carefully, answer may be different for each of us For some, their personal well-being is more important and for some, other people’s opinions matters more
Let’s just see which behavior is better. if someone shouts at us, is it easier to shout back or to remain internally stable
You may say remaining stable is extremely difficult
Yes but that’s where the strength comes in,because it requires strength to do something difficult Understand to shout back and then justify that the other person shouted first doesn’t require any strength People may say that I should have argued and finished the matter, they say it’s better to get angry rather than suppress it
But understand here we are not talking about suppressing anger, we are talking about simply not creating that turbulent energy of anger at all That mind you is strength
Please understand that anger is not strength. It’s an absolute weakness, because in those moments I have gone out of emotional control and going out of control is definitely not strength
Understand awareness of our thoughts is a must, as thoughts are followed by feelings and all my feelings put together, develops my attitude. So it is very important that we change our thoughts and automatically our attitude will change. From reacting towards people with anger, we will gradually start responding to people’s anger, by addressing the same problem lovingly and its in responding to situations and people that the strength lies
BELIEFS – EVERYTHING IS GOING TO CHANGE FOR THE BETTER
Begin your day with with this belief Everything is going to change for the better The mind of a man is the man. Change the mind and you will change the man You and your life will change only when you choose to change what goes into your mind. Life synchronizes itself to your dominant thought pattern you hit what you seek, you become what you keep thinking all day long.
Keep visualizing not just what you are, but what you will be. What I am stating is both faithand science Wake up believing everything is going to change for the better. Intention without action is nothing, so please backup your beliefs with action. Look for opportunities as if your whole life depended on it. Don’t leave a single stone unturned. When your mind expands, life expands Your opportunity is already waiting for you somewhere.
YOU JUST NEED TO MAGNETIZE IT IN YOUR LIFE
LIFE WILL NOT POSTPONE OUR DEATH
SO
SO LET’S NOT POSTPONE OUR LIFE
RELATIONSHIPS – OUR THOUGHTS ARE THE ROOT CAUSE OF OUR PROBLEMS IN RELATIONSHIPS
Our biggest problem in life is we are living most of our life mechanically and hence we suffer
Mechanically means with unawares. We wish each other every day good morning, but how meaningfully do we say it
*It is mostly said mechanically. Unless we become more aware and allow awareness to guide our lives we will be like a drunkard lost in his drunkard – ness.
*Understand more than the external world, it’s our internal world of thoughts that is disturbing us*
Understand that thoughts are only visitors in your mind and you are the host Thoughts are but a process of inner wordings of your own mind and that you are not the thoughts but separate from the thoughts
Learn to understand your thoughts and transform your thoughts
Learn to discipline the thoughts and you have a disciplined mind
Learn to visualize yourself happy, and successful and feel you are seeing God in others and in yourself Learn to use the power of visualizing in a creative way that is uplifting
We need to also learn to celebrate in others good fortune and success Don’t postpone your joy by being jealous of the other Learn to bless others success. Always have a bigger picture of life Learn to open your heart and embrace others mentally by opening your heart and giving love to others
Learn to feel others are teaching you something beautiful Understand that love touches lives of everyone and calms the mind of everyone
THE WORLD DEFINITELY NEEDS WARM HEARTS THAN HOT HEADS
MISUNDERSTANDING
QUESTION : Why do misunderstandings occur?
ANSWER : The word understand says to us
stand under No one is prepared to stand under anyone. Everyone wants to stand over everybody. That is the main cause of misunderstanding.
If you wish to grow in the spirit of understanding you must
1) Learn to be a good listener – let the other person talk and express himself
2) Do not belittle the other person, do not make him feel small, do not criticize him or find fault with him.
3)When you cannot get along well with others, do not find fault with them.
4)Remember there can be no true understanding without the spirit of humility.
5) Avoid arguments, always learn to discuss anything lovingly. Remember that tone makes all the difference in any discussions.
6) Even when you don’t agree with people, respect their opinions.
7) Always be on the lookout for opportunities to serve others, learn to be sensitive to others needs.
ALWAYS PRAY FOR AN UNDERSTANDING HEART
RELATIONSHIPS – HOLD ON TO YOUR GOODNESS
QUESTION : As children we heard the story of a scorpion that was drowning and a saint rescued it but the scorpion stung him. Someone asked the saint why he saved the scorpion even though it repeatedly stung him?
ANSWER : Yes the saint replied just because the scorpion did not loose its sanskar of stinging how could he leave his own sanskar of saving others. if we keep giving up our sanskars owing to others behavior whose loss would it be. Suppose you like helping others in need even at the cost of your comfort, you will have to retain your quality Even when others do not cooperate with you despite your kindness, you need to remind yourself that you help because that’s your quality
When we understand and realize that we are all unique souls, we realize that others may not have our specialities and we may not have theirs They will follow their sanskars and we will follow ours The problem with copying others is that we abandon our qualities, the moment we don’t find others displaying them
You may tell me that there’s a gap between Spirituality and how the world works?
Always remember Spirituality is the right way to go about things in the world It means using the original qualities of the spirit in practical life Spirituality does not mean listening to a discourse for half an hour and then doing things that are convenient to us, for the rest of the day When the time comes to act we need to live up to our goodness
HOLD ON TO YOUR GOODNESS AND LIVE YOUR CHARACTER AT ALL TIMES
ACCEPTANCE
Nothing in life is permanent, life is all about changing situations springing up surprises. In any given situation we definitely need to do our very best, and then accept the results gracefully. Understand that everything about life is not going to happen the way we want it to happen. Understanding the art of acceptance is a very important part of life. Acceptance simply means that you make a commitment to yourself.
“Today I will accept people, situations, circumstances and events as they occur” This means I will know that this moment is as it should be
Understand when you struggle against this moment, you are actually struggling against the entire universe. You can always wish for things to be better in the future. But in this moment you have to accept things as they are. What will be, will be Understand happiness lies in adjusting to the events of life gracefully
Something very important to understand is that when you feel frustrated or upset by a person or situation, remember that you are not reacting to the person or situation, but to your own feelings about the person or the situation Let’s understand that these are your feelings, and your feelings are not someone else’s fault
When you recognize and understand this completely you are ready to take responsibility for your situation and for all the events you see as problems
Once you do this, every so called upsetting situation will become an opportunity for the creation of something new and beautiful Reality is an interpretation and if you choose to interpret reality in this way you will have many teachers around you and many opportunities to evolve
Understand whatever relationships you have attracted in your life at this moment are precisely the ones you need in your life at this moment There is a hidden meaning behind everything that is happening in your life. All problems contain the seeds of opportunity, and this awareness allows you to take the moment and transform it into a better situation.
DIFFERENCES IN RELATIONSHIPS
Please stop treating differences in relationships as conflicts, view them as points of view. The moment you relate to differences as pain, you will experience them as pain
A time will definitely come in your life when people will regret why they treated you badly
Understand no one in this world is pure and perfect. Never stop learning from your experiences, because life will never stop teaching
Never stop doing your best and being good to others just because no one gives you the credit as that very goodness will come back to you in unexpected ways at the right time
Understand that some people come in your life as blessing and some to teach us some lessons
It’s time we started looking at life differently
RELATIONSHIPS – Marriage
QUESTION : What is an understanding that one should have in a husband and wife relationship?
ANSWER : The relationship between a husband and a wife should not be based on demands, but one can have preferences
Please understand the distinction between demand and preference. Demand makes one rigid and overpowering, meaning without this I refuse to be happy, while preference makes one light and inclusive, means I prefer this, but if it does not happen it is OK. So this makes the relationship more flexible, and understanding
As in all relationships, there will be differences in this relationship too, but please give more importance to your love and commitment towards the relationship
Understand marriage is a relationship of commitment and not convenience and is a divine relationship
On a lighter note, as you enjoy the joy rides in an amusement park, even though the rides at times gives you the jitters and appear scary, you still enjoy the rides, Similarly enjoy this relationship of love and commitment.
HOW DO WE RELAX
How do we relax despite facing traumas in the unjust world that we live in?
These are the basic questions in this minds of many
A mind filled with tension and unhappiness is the result of a toxic centre such a mind creates problems to oneself and others
In contrast a mind, which is relaxed and happy comes from a nourishing center. Transforming a toxic center into a nourishing center is the hallmark of wise living
Man lives in the hope of changing the world, so that he would be happy, but truth be told, let us change ourselves. The world will change by itself
Now at the same time, let us not get lost in changing ourselves only and forget to include others in our growth
Reflect on this
To a question, Who is flying the kite?
A boy replies : I am flying the kite
The tail of the kite says I am flying the kite
The wind says I am flying the kite
The string says I am flying the kite
Finally the voice of the Lord says Oh my dear children we are flying the kite
Hence the vedic prayer Let us all be enlightened
Understand, we can relax in this unjust world only when we teach ourselves and others to strengthen our strength and weaken our weaknesses
Whatever be our weaknesses, if you identify with it, the toxic center in us will lose its grip on us
Let our goodness come from our strengths, and not from our weaknesses
Then the magic of life will bless you
BEING RELAXED IS WISE, BEGIN WITH BEING WISE AND YOU WILL ALWAYS BE RELAXED
IMPORTANCE OF HUMOR IN OUR LIVES
Life can be a process of growing or ageing. Growing involves adding life to one’s years and aging involves adding years to one’s life. Life is only fulfilling if life is a process of growing
Reflect on this
Mom persuades her son to go to school. “Son are you ready to go to school”
Son says ” Mummy nobody likes me in school”
“But darling, you must go to school”
“But the teachers don’t like me in school”
“But sweetheart you are 45 years old and are the Principal of the school, so you have to go to school”
Just look – a 45 year old man, but physiologically a kid. Very few people grow up in life, rest just grow old.
Growing up in life involves adding maturity and joy to every moment of life. Without contributing to the poetry of life nobody can be happy
To be creative is a basic need in everyone, hence allow the force to emerge. Start by being creative in cracking jokes
When you crack a joke, more than the joke the laughter that remains in your being is nourishing
Laughter creates a deep silence and in that silence, the problems of the serious mind dissolve
Bringing in a pinch of humour into every situation of life could make all the difference in our attitude towards everything in our lives and makes our lives easier
EVERY THING COMES DOWN TO OUR OWN PERCEPTION AND ATTITUDE IN LIFE
From Discouragement to Encouragement
A husband says: ” I wonder why many people get depressed in life?
I have provided everything to my wife and still she is depressed
I asked him” You have given everything, but have you encouraged her or discouraged her“
Encouraging people in every given situation brings forth their hidden abilities and the very best in them
Understand telling others constantly that they are useless, unintelligent destroys the possibilities of bringing out the best in them
Encouragement involves a little loving effort, but results in a very big difference in the life of the other
A pilot while flying realized that he had lost direction. Suddenly he sighted a heavy truck on the highway beaming its headlights, this helped the pilot to make out the path of the highway for landing as the plane was running out of fuel
The pilot after a safe landing said to himself “I am sure the truck driver would not have realized that the trucks head lights saved so many lives
In the same way, we may not know how we could be contributing by giving small gestures of kindness and encouragement to everyone we come across in our life
Understand everyone needs love, understanding and encouragement, inspite of all their weaknesses
Please realize small gestures of appreciation and encouragement, definitely makes a world of difference to everyone
YOUR CONTRIBUTIONS OF SMALL GESTURES OF ENCOURAGEMENT COULD MAKE A LOT OF DIFFERENCE TO MANY
FORGIVENESS
Christ’s simple words of love ” Father forgive them, for they know not what they do“
This is an extremely important message to mankind even today, a message that each one of us should apply in our lives, if it is essential to rid the heart and mind of all the bitterness and resentment
When someone has acted unkindly against us, why do we feel we have to do something about it?
Why can’t we just leave it in God’s hands, knowing fully well that the Divine will solve the problem for us. In countless ways this law has worked for me through out my life and rest assured that it will work for you and all mankind
The trouble with us is we cannot let go of our anger and bitter feelings against the person who has wronged us
Understand all of us are imperfect and at some point of time have hurt others also .Have we not experienced forgiveness from any noble soul. Don’t we feel grateful for being forgiven. Always keep that incident alive in your mind and just let go and see how the magic of forgiveness gives you peace of mind
Regular Meditation gives you the strength and awareness to become forgiving
Forgive even before forgiveness is asked for, not because the other person deserves forgiveness,, but because we need to be at peace with ourselves
DON’T TREAT PEOPLE AS BAD AS THEY ARE, TREAT THEM AS GOOD AS YOU ARE
SURRENDER
I have found that my deepest awakenings come when I surrender myself completely to God. No human experience can match the perfect love and bliss when we truly surrender to God
God has no favourites, He loves each of us equally, so never be afraid to turn back to God, no matter what mistakes you have made in the past, just let go of the guilt and surrender to God with a commitment never to repeat the same mistakes, and then look forward to life with a new hope, let bygones be bygones for its never too late to start a fresh
Wherever God has placed you, do your best and surrender, this is the whole purpose of spirituality, just let go of things you have no control over and let God in
Accept each experience that comes to you as coming from Him and use God’s power to change your life. Therein lies the wealth of the Divine to learn to live in HIS WILL
HURT
QUESTION : Why do I get hurt so often, is hurt part and parcel of life?
ANSWER : What impacts the quality of our life is the movement of our thoughts and feelings.
Please understand more than the negative experiences it is the negative interpretations of the negative experiences that affect our life to a greater degree
A teacher conducting a workshop, observed one of the students in the last row had fallen asleep
In a very short while the student woke up and on noticing this the teacher gently asked the student to come and take a seat in the front row
The student appeared angry and the teacher politely asked
It appears that you are upset by something, the student replied : You have insulted me
The teacher said I have merely summoned you from the back row to the front row therefore where is the insult?
Another student in the workshop stood up and told the teacher : Had you called me over to the front row I would have felt honoured
Something worth observing, same situation viewed by two different people are two different experiences
More than the fact what hurts us most is the way we look at the facts
Lets understand if somebody looks at you wrongly, it is the other person’s problem and not yours, and hence you have to be compassionate to his wrong perceptions
So please do not allow disturbing thoughts to control and ruin your life
EVERYTHING COMES DOWN TO OUR OWN MIND – SET
FAILURE IS A PART OF LIFE
In every given situation of life, we need to do our best according to the circumstances and then accept the results gracefully
Both success and failure are not in our hands
Understand we cannot be successful all the time, failures are a part of everyone’s lives and we need to treat failures as a learning experience
Failure is a fertilizer for success. Failure is God’s or nature’s purpose to teach us something profound
Many times relationships do not work because men and women have become insensitive to each others comfort and discomfort zones
Struggles also are a part and parcel of life, we need to make our struggles sacred. Understand Mother universe has her own plans for all of us and we have to have patience as everything is happening according to a cosmic plan
Happiness lies in adjusting to the events of life
MANY THINGS ARE BEYOND OUR CONTROL HUG EACH MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE AND NOURISH YOUR CONNECTION TO THE UNIVERSE
KEEPING A BALANCE
Keep your balance These three words, said to us so often by Babaji, are loaded with meaning and applicable to countless situations of life
The Master so often responds to questions with : Keep your balance as the questioner may not have even realized that he or she is going to extremes Some people think that, since meditation is the key to spiritual path, perhaps it would be best to spend as many hours in meditation. We may think it is best to avoid marriage, live in solitude meditating all day. Understand when we go to extremes our God – given natural system begins to revolt. Our senses and desires that are then suppressed by going to extremes become stronger
Therefore Master says live in the world, live the life of a householder do all your duties towards everyone. Please understand Spirituality can be practiced by any ordinary householder. Masters also by way of example show us that they also have families and are living a householder life.
The secret is to keep a balance and not to go to extremes under any circumstances of life
CHANGE IS A GOOD THING, LET’S ACCEPT IT GRACEFULLY
ITS THE LITTLE THINGS THAT MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE
A man was taking a morning walk on the beach. He saw that hundreds of starfish came in the morning tide and when the tide receded, the starfish were left behind on the beach. the man took a few steps picked up one and threw it into the water. He did that repeatedly. Another man who came along couldn’t understand what this man was doing. He asked what are you doing, there are hundreds of starfish. How many can you help. What difference does it make?
This man didn’t reply, he picked up one more starfish and threw it into the water and said
it makes a difference to this one
What difference are we making? Big or small, it doesn’t matter. If everybody made a small difference, we would end up with a big difference, wouldn’t we?
A boy was drowning in a river and he shouted for help. A man passing by jumped into the river and saved the boys life. As the man was leaving the boy said Thank you the man asked for what? The boy replied for saving my life. The man looked into the boy’s eyes and said
Son make sure when you grow up that your life was worth saving
Remember to have a purpose and a philosophy to guide you through life, it’s all the small things that make a big difference in life.
No matter what you plan in life, you never know what life has planned for you
Make a difference, no matter how small it is
ATTITUDE – MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE
How is it that under same set of circumstances some people break records, while others break themselves? The difference is ATTITUDE
A positive attitude does not mean that a person is blind to facts, nor does it mean that he has to agree and accept everything. It only means that he is a solution – focused person. It is the ability to see an hidden opportunity in every problem. A positive attitude is a frame of mind, a process and a way of looking at things.
A person with a positive attitude cannot be stopped. A person with a negative attitude cannot be helped. In other words, a person with a positive attitude is
UNSTOPPABLE